An Open Letter

To All Those Who Work In Shared Offices (especially mine):

Look, I understand that shared space can be a bummer. People coming in, using your stuff, sitting at your computer, getting their ear gunk on your phone, what have you. But it really chaps my hide when I go into the joint bathroom, and not only are four of the five toilets out of order (and no one calls for assistance) but the one working pot has doo-doo paper in it.

Really, is that hard to flush, and glance over your shoulder as you exit the stall to make sure the remnants of your turd have gone the way of the sewer? I think not. Common courtesy, people.

Frankly, if you must know, I am a believer in doing the business at home in the morning before you leave. How hard is it to take a few extra minutes to wrangle a poop out before heading to office? I myself am a once-a-day kinda gal, but I know many of you out there tend to visit the can several times daily for a colon blow, as it is inevitable, especially those in training and consuming massive amounts of food. I can give you a pass on that. But I can only hope that you are in-and-out, and leave a clean bowl for the subsequent visitors.

Now, you may argue that you don't want to waste water by too many flushes, and I can get that. I am all about saving the earth, one flush at a time. But the reality is that I'm going to have flush it myself before I go anyways, because god help me I'm not doing my business on top of someones leftovers.

I hope I am not sounding like a stick in the mud (pun intended? perhaps...) but frankly, this grosses my shit out. And here's one last thought: If you do need to spend an inordinate amount of time on the shitter, can you please try to flush as you go? Cause what's even more nasty that floaters and doo-doo paper is the stench that hangs in the air in a closed stall because you've been in there too long with your turds just sitting in the water.

Too much to ask?

I think not.

Let's use our heads,
Megan