Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Randoms and Questions

1. Can someone please tell me that Lance Armstrong and Ashley Olsen are NOT hooking up?

2. Do people who work at 7-11 get to drink free Slurpees?

3. Wearing the same fleece for six straight days makes you smell like a homeless man. (no offense to homeless men)

4. When did Halloween become a national holiday equivalent to say, Thanksgiving or Christmas, replete with outrageous, wasteful lawn decorations, endless parties and sugar/booze binges?

5. Oh wait. I'm not against those things. At least not the candy part. Nevermind.

6. But how has it become an excuse to dress up like hookers? (no offense to hookers, though I imagine it might take a lot more than my prude ass to offend them)

7. The new best food on Earth are honey wheat pretzels. Good God, I could barely pull my hand out of the bag to type this sentence.

8. One might think that, given the fact that my boyfriend is so far away and we see each other for one week a month, that I might lay in bed at night and think about him. And I do. Absolutely. But I also think about candy.

9. And no, I won't share the details of my boyfriend-thoughts....or the candy...but let's just say Mike n Ikes are in there....somewhere...maybe even next to the Red Vines.

10. My new favorite tv addiction is Tell Me You Love Me, but tell me, how come every tv show or talk show or article in magazines all talk about unhappy marriage? Isn't anyone happily married and getting sexed anymore? Is that what I get to look forward to? Consultation from Oprah Magazine on why my marriage sucks? Awesome. Gimme the ring and the minister NOW.

11. Why do people always assume that, just because you have a webcam, you're doing something dirty with it?


Nolan's Mommy said...

The pages are reporting a hot and heavy makeout session at some bar and they had dinner on Wednesday. Dude, Ashley is smokin.
..and people think youre doing dirty things for the same reasons people make sex tapes. its a dirty little secret and everyone loves secrets, especially dirty ones.

Andra Sue said...

#1--Eeeeeeew. Can't be true, just can't.

#3--Double eeeeeew.


Erin said...

Red Vines! For a bad day, that's my go-to comfort food, even above chocolate (which is my daily comfort food). And I think I subsisted solely on Mike n' Ikes my senior year of college. Love 'em.

Oh, and #1...I heard that, too. Eeeeeeeeeew is right, Andra Sue!

The Big Cheese said...

I for one would like to know who is getting to see you being naughty on the web cam?

Sex tapes? I need to spend more time looking over your video collection the next time I come to town...

The Clyde said...

I've only caught about 10 minutes of Tell Me You Love Me...but those ten minutes consisted of a very beautiful naked girl and that guy from Lost (Boone) making it happen on a couch.

Needless to say it is now being Tivo'd.

Lance Notstrong said...

1. He probably saw her on Full House when he was 17 and said to himself, "I gotta have me some of that"!!!

2. Yes, we do :-)

3. None taken :-)

4. I want to come to your Halloween parties!!!

6. The term "hooker" is old school. I prefer "Man Whore".

7. You're right, they are the bomb!!! I would love to roll around naked in a pile of Honey Wheat pretzels :-)

8. I'm not even going to go into what I think about while lying in bed. It involves hand cuffs, a garden hose, one of those wire whisks, and plenty of Honey Wheat pretzels.....that's all I'm saying.

10. Only Al Bundy and Peggy :-)

11. You're not? That's the only reason I bought one!!!

Prin said...

LOL @ #8

For #1, I'm guessing Ashley is the "Vince Vaughn" to his Jennifer.. :D

#3, yeah. It sucks, doesn't it? lol

#11, I read books on my webcam. No, that's a lie. I don't have a webcam. And I don't read books.

Danielle in Iowa said...

1. Lance creeps me out! I have heard creepy rumors from the RAGBRAI circuit as well...

3. I think I might need to invent fleece that doesn't absorb odors...

6. Overheard in the class I TA today: "I have spent more time on Facebook in the last few days because of all the Halloween pictures girls post of themselves where they use Halloween as an excuse to wear practically nothing."