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So Cheese brought it to my attention that I neglected to report I would also be running a half-marathon during my Nashville trip this past weekend.

Not sure why I forgot, but I did.

And I ran it.

Turns out Nashville got itself some hills, and I missed that memo.

Also turns out that trying to run 13.1 very torturous hilly miles in 90 degree heat after coming from 8 months of 30 or lower temps here in flat, flat Chicago is just a bit harder then anticipated.

It wasn't the going up part of the hills that beat my ass - I am actually pretty good at that part, technique-wise.

It was the going down part that crippled my quads by Mile 11 (up to which point I was running a PR, despite the conditions).

After Mile 11 and 12, I watched my PR be wiped out by four minutes. But in the end, I finished, and I am proud of that.

I also ended up in the medical tent right after I finished (first time ever in a race for me!). It was super scary at the time, but I'm fine now - well, still quad-cripped two days later, but mostly fine.

I didn't see Dane from the Biggest Loser - I checked the results, and there is a guy with his same name but a different age, so I can't tell if it's actually him. But the guy that's listed finished in just under 6 hours, I believe.

And given that it was the second hardest race I ever ran (second only to my Ironman), kudos to whoever that man was for finishing, Biggest Loser or not. Dang, that was a brutal day!

The most exciting part of the weekend was hanging out with my brother and his wife. I can't even really articulate how much fun I had just visiting and hanging out, and how generous they were to open their home to me. I wish I could have stayed all week! I keep having these fantasies about moving down there, living on my little farm, slowing down my pace of life - just simplifying everything.

It also smells so good down there - all Spring-like, and flowery, and not-Chicago.

Sigh. I do like the South.

And I am swamped with work right so I gotta run.

My Brother Will Be Interested in This

Apparently, our pal, Dane, from the BL marathon fiasco, will be trying his running legs again at the Nashville marathon in April.

You know who else is running that race?

Yup - it's me!

Well, I will actually be running the half marathon.

But hey - if you ask the BL -it's all the same, right?

I guess you can sign up on the marathon site to "Run with Dane."

Even though I am already signed up for the half, I thought, "Huh, that would be interesting...think of all the scoop I could get out of him!"

But then I remembered - the marathons I run are 26.2 miles.

Yeah, I said it.

Okay, So NOW I Have a Beef

So I will first give credit where it's due, and acknowledge that I saw this on Laura's blog.

But her blog is now private, so I will relay the message.

But thanks, Laura, for your sluthing.

Okay - here goes.

So you know how I didn't really pitch a bitch about how on The Biggest Loser that one guy got the IM distance wrong? I figured - hey, it's still a big accomplishment, maybe it was just a mistake.

But then I learned from Amy in her comment that BL actually editted out the "half" in the guy's description - and that he DID in fact say "half-Ironman."

Ooooo-kay.

So BL lied.

Whatever.

But THEN there was last night.

Anyone else wonder how a man who was morbidly obese and totally inactive was suddenly able to squeek out a 3:53 marathon just three months later?

Well, I did. Especially considering my little sister, who is all of 100 pounds, ran five marathons in the last calander year (many of those as Boston Qualifying attempts) and her best was 3:53.

And the weight is not even really the issue - but rather the fact that a completely inactive man (for many-a-year) suddenly up and ran a 3:53 in three months?

An event that most active fit people need 3-4 months to run?

It sounds fake, and it apparently was.

Laura discovered the blog of a woman who also ran the race. Apparently, the woman discovered that Dane (who was behind her throughout the race) suddenly appeared at the finish line - in front of her.

How did this happen?

Turns out, a van picked up Dane and his wife along the way (mile 23), and drove them in.

And not at 3:53 either - the woman marathoner finished in 6:14, which would mean that Dane would have finished later then that. Well, would have, if he didn't get the van ride.

But yet, there they were, cheering and celebrating his "marathon" finish.

(I should mention that Dane's wife found the blog too, and actually commented that they were picked up at mile 23 and driven in to make up for time they lost while filming at a water station - whatever - he still didn't run the whole thing and he in no way ran it in the time stated).

Before I launch into my issue with BL, let me just say that, dishonest editting aside, Dane did his own part in deciving the public about his finish. I mean, he faked crossing the line. He perpetrated like he actually finished.

It may only be 3.2 miles, but then own your 23 mile run, and don't lie about it.

But my bigger issue is with BL.

First the IM thing, then this?

You know, a half-Ironman and a 23-mile run (or even a half-marathon) are HUGE HUGE accomplishments on their own.

So why lie about them? Why try to build it up to something bigger? Why not just promote the goal for what it is, instead of trying to make it into something else?

I mean, what these contestants are doing is at times hard to wrap the mind around - the stunning weight loss, the years of inactivity turned around through fitness, and new life goals they never before considered.

Hell, even a 5k at that point is a big effing deal. So celebrate THAT.

Eh, maybe I am overreacting to this.

But I remember when this show has the best premise and spirit on television. Now it just seems like they are being eaten up by their own hype.

If they just brought it back to the basics - the reality of what it's like to go from morbidly obese to healthy and full of goals - this blog might very well become the BL Fan Site.

But instead, this show is starting to leave a bad taste in my mouth - and don't get my ass started about the product endorsements.

Ugh. I need a new show.

Good thing I recently found "The First 48."

From weight loss to murderers.

Seems a logical progression. Yes?

You All Know Me So Well....

Okay, I admit it.

I didn't watch BL tonight.

No BL, no Facebook commenting.

A big something came up this evening and I was faced with a choice to watch, or to get my work done ahead of time so I can attend to personal things over the next few days.

But as luck would have it, I was walking through the living room to the kitchen for some more coffee when I heard it:

"And now I'm training for an Ironman!"

Huh wha---?

So of course I stop dead in my tracks and there's Blaine in full bike gear - helment and all.

Intriguing, methinks.

I must watch.

And this is what followed:

Blaine: It's over a mile and half swim-
Megan's Mind: ....umm...that doesn't sound right....
Blaine: And an 80 mile bike-
Megan's Mind: ....what the fuckity fuck....?.....
Blaine: And then a half marathon!
Megan's Mind: wrong answer.

And then I paused, and thought, "Eh, but who cares? It's still a massive accomplishment to go from over 300 pounds to training for such a big race, Ironman or not. I can get onboard with that goal! Go on with your new bad self!"

But the funniest part (and what compelled me to write this even though I can't speak to anything else that happened on it tonight) was that I immediately got two emails, one from Danielle and one from Michelle - both like (paraphrased), "Oh my gosh - can you believe!" So much so that I literally laughed out loud as I read them - thanks guys! That totally made my night!

So yeah, good for him. And good for triathlon in general. I support anyone that puts triathlon on the map.

Well, maybe not JLo. She bugs me.

Okay - back to work!!!

Food

Across the bottom on my computer screen are five Word documents, each sporting its own unique post.

My thoughts about topics ranging from my new infatuation with "Cops" and "The First 48," (summary - real life criminals aren't as smart as "Law and Order" make them out to be) to my feeling on BL last night (can we all join together and say "finally?")

And I'll get to them all -

But right now I can’t think of anything by the episode of “Man v. Food” that I am watching.

Ever see this show?

Summary – Typical food show where guy (Host Adam) goes around the country eating food. At the end of eat episode, he takes on a food challenge – whether it be eating spicy fritters, 15 dozen oysters, or overstuffed sanwiches.

Now, I am fully aware that I shouldn’t morally support shows that promote senseless binge eating for a multitude of reasons (including but not exclusive to its subtle celebration of the obesity problem in this country, the fact that families are struggling to put food on tables while Host Adam is shoveling hundreds of oysters down his gullet, and – every mother’s favorite – the starving children in Africa, of course).

But tonight, when Adam attempted to eat three 13 inch Man-Cakes (oh yeah, they are what they sound like – thick fluffy rounds of buttermilk breakfast heaven) and then washes it down with fresh donuts….

Well, let’s say I blacked out and woke up with my lips around the base of the flatscreen, covered in popcorn kernels and my own drool.

And who knows what he’s like in real life, but I’ll be danmed if I don’t have a bacon-flavored crush on Host Adam.

I don’t care that he appears to be expanding in size with each new episode – I’d wipe the sausage bits from his cheeks as he chokes down a monster pizza, or dab the Italian beef juice from his lips.

Of course, I ooh and aaah over the types and amounts of food he eats, while Cheese is left to wonder:

“My god, what must his asshole feel like?”

My Backlog

Okay, so I obviously haven't been around lately, and I have a whole post 'splaining why, but before I go there (it might not go up until after BL tomorrow), I thought I would post my woefully large backlog of photos of events in the last few weeks.

Last weekend, Chicago saw it's share of Bloggerland, starting with a brief visits from A from Running Down a Dream, and her lovely husband J. Cheese and I had dinner, drinks and story time with them - although we had to drag them through one of the coldest night yet here!

And then Sunday night brought with it a visit from B, all the way from Canada!! Captian Cactus (Brian) was in for a work convention, and we had dinner Sunday night with him. Then, as a bonus, we got to hang with him Tuesday - for BL!! At our house!!! His wife A sent with him a bottle of wine and a MASSIVE bag of cookies (rumor has it there were 60 cookies in the bag when it got off the plane - the picture below shows the damage Cheese and I did to it by Tuesday night - yeah, there's about 12 cookies left there).

Needless to say, the diet has started.

It was quite a weekend - so much fun and just hanging out!

Fast forward to this weekend - about 1400 miles away, Momo was celebrating her birthday with her own personalized 40K! Happy Birthday to Momo, and I can't wait to read all about the fun!

Back here on the home turf, I had my own little party to attend - The Nugget's 2nd birthday!!! Last year I missed his party because I was in Miami running a half marathon, so this year I got to participate in all the festivities.

Anyone else ever have been to a party with like ten toddlers all at once? I learned lots of stuff - like how germs spread so quickly, what a Brain Toy is, how loud a four year old can scream, and how Cheese and I will single-handedly save the economy through Trojan condom purchases.

Shit's intense, man.

Nugget seemed confused at first, but that wore off as soon as he started to dig through his pile or presents. He was a natural!

Take a close look - and guess which one Aunt Megan wrapped.

If you said "The tee-ball set in the Target bag" you would have been correct!

I guess when Nugget opened this present (of the green and white shirt he is holding), he screamed, "So cuuuuuttteeee!!!!" And it looked AMAZING with his new clutch and Jimmy Choos.

Yeah, he spends a lot of time with my sister.

But of course, his best toy of the night (not my tee-ball set) was Tow-Mater, from The Cars movie. It sings and moves its eyes, and he luuuuuvvvs it.

And what party is complete without a Bob Builder cake? So delish, but I was good and limited myself to one tiny piece. Boy, my sister can throw a party!!!

I rounded out the night with a girl's night at my friend Rachel's house, where Rachel and I kicked ass at Pictionary - I have pictures but I don't have persmission to post them, so when I do, I will share.

And then of course the Superbowl, which was also held at Ellen's (two parties in a row!) and I wasn't so much intersted in the game as I was playing with Nugget and eating delishish foods.

Phew - okay, that was a lot for me to catch up on. I need to go to work now!

It's Tuesday, And You Know What That Means....

Not since Vicky has America so scorned a BL character as they do Joelle – our Gray Team mistress of all things bullshit, excuses, and nonsensical talking.

Hey, she may very well be a lovely person in everyday life, but we’ll never know -what with all the yapping about having “no fear,” or “having a light” or “opportunity something or another” or frankly whatever else she said as she yabbered away up there at the scale.

Week after week, Joelle has raised Bob’s blood pressure and punched the hearts of America, unifying us in our collective finger-crossings for either her epiphany or her voting off.

And after last week, it seemed that the frustration towards Joelle had reached a head, pushing her to height of public distain, nary to be challenged by another.

Until this week.

So without further ado-

Congratulations, David. You did it, man.

You pulled it off.

Few thought it possible, but you have globbered your way into Joelle’s coveted position.

You managed to swing the pendulum of scorn right in the direction of your oversized, fried chicken eatin’, Marlboro Man smokin’, can’t-be-bothered-to-lose-a-pound-despite-the-fact-that-your-partner-stands-to-pull-down-the-biggest-loss-in-BL-history head.

You sat at home, comfortable in your life of artery-clogging over-eating inactivity (or at the very least – not enough activity). You continued to smoke ‘em if you got ‘em (and apparently, you had ‘em).

Meanwhile, Danny boy was sweating with the heavies over on campus, subjecting himself to Jillian’s neck-vein-bulging torment, and learning how to substitute glazed donuts with Extra sugar free gum and Brita water.

Danny hiked himself up over those hills, while you hiked up your belt notches after a man-date with Burger King.

Listen, I’m not minimizing how hard it is to lose pounds when you’re not in the la-la world of the Malibu campus. Just ask my ass – it’ll tell you.

But man, it doesn’t even look like your trying.

No one is expecting you to pull the number Danny pulled at campus. But any thoughts to maybe not smoking when the cameras were present? Eating a carrot stick instead of a plate full of fried foods?

I don’t know about you, but just having those cameras in my face would force some sort of accountability, no?

Guess not.

So hats off to a job not-so-well-done.

I hope for your health and your future and your life, you will turn it around. I hope the bottom will rise up and hit you, and you will get it.

I hope you find those demons, you chase them down, and you kick their asses. For good.

'Cause what are your other options?

(picture courtesy of my sister Devin and her husband - apparently Tuesdays are celebrated by both Biggest Loser AND laundry)

A BL Post

It’s funny because when I first turned on the BL tonight, I thought to myself:

I so hope Damien wins this whole thing.

And sure as shit, when the cards fell, so did Damien.

I think what frustrates me is actually something beyond Joelle (and I’ll deal with her ass in a second). No, rather it’s that there are people on there that are still so focused on playing the game.

Yeah, yeah – I get it – at the end of the day, it’s still a game. There's money involved, and that usually makes people go bat-shit crazy.

But this show has always been different. The best part of it comes NOT from the "winning" aspect, but from the "oh-my-gosh-how-did-they-do-that-it's-so-amazing-I'm-going-to-the-gym-right-NOW!" aspect.

But when you have two people – one who appears to be a source of motivation for every person on that campus, and another who can’t seem to muster up a “yes” when asked if she wants to be there – you reach a point when you say, “Fuck the game – let’s pick life.”

Because BL or not, I believe that there are people who just simply – no matter what – will never change. I know that’s not very psychologist-y of me to say, but it’s true. They just won’t. No amount of therapy, yelling, forcing, whatever. Nothing will make them change.

Why?

Simple.

Because what they know and have been doing is too easy. It’s too comfortable. It’s simply too hard to make a life change to the extent that these contestants need to.

And because people change only when what they have been doing no longer works - when what they have been doing hurts, or leaves them with nothing.

And for most of those contestants, that’s exactly the place they got to when they decided to try out for this show.

Well, most except for out little friend, Joelle.

Seems to me that Joelle (if you listened carefully during last week’s episode), has never felt discomfort to the point of necessary change. As she said, she is a grown-ass woman living with her mother and making $12,000 a year.

Now, I don’t know what she does for a living, and perhaps it’s something uber-noble like run a soup kitchen or teach illiterate adults to read on her own dime. And perhaps she lives with her mother only because she’s dying of cancer and she’s helping out.

But something tells me that’s not true – well, especially because Joelle almost high-tailed it off the BL campus with $25,000 in her back pocket and a belief that now she “can get out of my momma’s home!”

And when you put the pieces of her life together, methinks that Joelle isn’t hurting enough to change. She has gotten to this place in her life by devouring never ending plates of ranch-dressing-covered excuses with a big fat buttery side of delusion, topped nicely with a dollop of full-fat-creamy enabling. Frankly, no amount of yelling will force her to give up those excuses, that basement bedroom, that scrappy paycheck.

Because the alternative of a better healthier life is too hard. The running, dieting, sweating, changing – it’s all too hard.

I mean - how many of us would so much rather lay around in our recliners watching movies and and binging on junk instead of dragging ourselves in the cold and snow to the gym, and eating grilled chicken and spinach, with a side of string cheese for a snack?

*arm raised*

And to distract and avoid "the hard" – she uses all this yakety-yaking crap. Like, what the hell was up with the “No Fear” comment when she got on the scale? No fear? Really? That doesn’t even make any sense. No fear of the scale? The retaliation? Carla?

Or my personal favorite of the night – when Carla asked her what she’s going to do, and she talked some gooble-gobble about “revealing a goal” or some shit so stupid I can’t even hardly remember.

So yeah - the bottom line is that Game Play got Damien kicked off, and, as proving to be the case this season more then any other – Game Play can really suck when you are talking about people’s lives.

Man, I can’t wait to see Bob’s face when he walks in next week to see which member of his team is home.

Good moobaly.

Turds

So the Biggest Loser started last night.

Mama pajama! Them is some big folk!

Cheese is convinced that BL is trying to get a person to have their first 200 pound weight loss. After last night, they’ll get it for sure this season. I mean, that one kid weighed in at like 450 pounds.

I gotta say though – after this first episode, I am sort of rooting for all of them to win.

Well, all of them except for Laura.

She’s a cry baby.

And I know I say it every time – but what the FUCK are these people crying about?

And I love how they say shit like, “When we pulled into the ranch, it was the first time I realized I needed help.” Or, “When that really old man almost died on the gym floor, it was the first time I realized we were all really sick.”

The first time, people?

Really?

‘Cause the years of multiple doctor’s warning, rampant diabetes and high blood pressure, inability to breath regularly when walking even a couple feet, and the size 48 pants weren’t clue enough?

The fact that your organs are so filled with fat they are actually growing so big and pushing your lungs up and closing them off – still no idea, huh?

Best line of the night?

“We’re a bunch of fat kids in a really fat gym class.”

Of course, I celebrated the new season with a dinner of Weight Watchers Smart Ones…and two ice cream sammys.

Yeah...yeah I did.

*lowers head in fake, insincere shame*

But hear me out – I allowed myself this slight binge because I will be forced to have nothing for two days.

Well, nothing but a GALLON of liquid laxative, followed by what I believe to be a large rod shove up my poop hole.

Yes folks – that’s right.

I am having a colonoscopy.

And endoscopy (but I don’t know what that is, I just do as I’m told at this point)

It’s a long story, but the Reader’s Digest version is that I was sent to the GI docs as a result of my most recent kidney check up. The GI doc took one look at my history and my family’s history, and was like, “Yeah, we need to take care of this.” So he sends me through a battery of tests, mostly “just in case” and to rule things out.

So I like to look at the next few days as my own personal version of Gwyneth Paltrow’s colon cleanse.

At least it’ll kick any remnants of my Christmas cookie indiscretions out of the system, yeah?

BL - All Winners

Well, all told – it’s hard to bag on a bunch of people who collectively unloaded over 1000 pounds.

I mean, most of them looked SMOKIN’!

Heba, Ed, Shalley and of course, her daughter Aimee, Colleen’s dad (I expected a bit more from Colleen though), and Amy and Phil – WHOA!

Red dress = Upgrade!

LT seems to have forgotten the BL would be checking back with him. I mean, don’t get me wrong – 87 pounds is no small bag of potatoes, but when you are tipping upwards of almost 4 bills, 87 pounds over the course of all that time is like a missed McMuffin and side of hash brown for that morning's breakfast. Especially when you have people pulling total numbers consistently over 100.

(Note: I am not minimizing the epic difficulty of weight loss, considering I have been trying to lose the same 10 pounds for four months now – point is, everyone else that got sent home around their time seems to have stuck with it and its surprising that he pulled such low numbers for his weight. That is all. Please, no hate mail. My cellulite can't handle it.)

And I have no real words for Vicki except – Congrats, you didn’t fall on the floor…yes, you are still likely ugly on the inside…good luck trying to maintain post-show because no you have no incentive to workout twice daily….etc.

She did what she set out to do, and while it didn’t bag her the quarter of a million, I hope at least she took away some good baked chicken recipes, and a new found love for broccoli and Extra gum.

Unlikely. But that’s her battle, not mine.

Mine is tucked deep inside my saddle bags and THUT.

But you know what would be awesome? A one/two year follow up! Like a HUGE reunion show - a "Where are they now?" for all the past contestents.

See, that to me would be the inspiring part. How do these people do it once they go back to real life?

I mean, put anyone on a secluded ranch with top-notch trainers and the ability to work out 8 hours a days, and you would be hard pressed to find someone that fails that task.

But life a real life, with a real job, and real responsibilities, and try keeping to a fitness and eating schedule to maintain that - now THAT is the challenge.

I would like to hear how people do it - if they are doing it.

Nonetheless- good show. Like to see people overcome the things they never thought they could. Like Michelle- I believe her when she says "I know I can do anything now."

Yeah, I've felt that way before...back in April.

It's a good feeling.

A GREAT feeling.

Well done, BL contestents.

Will You Be Watching?

BL tonight, bitches.

Expect commentary.

Lots of it.

Especially if you-know-who wins.

To be continued....

Good and Bad

First off, I missed BL last night because I went out and stuffed myself silly with Mexican food with my family. Who got kicked off?

Also if you do nothing at all for the next day, do this : SIGN UP FOR NETFLIX.

Holy 21st century, I have arrived.

Not only have we had a movie or series to watch everyday for the last two weeks, you barely have to do anything expect for click your mouse to get it.

And most of the thie movies you can stream right through your computer!

I mean - it's like when we first got DVR - I'm watching shit I would have never dreamed of before!

Genius.

And dropping the disk off at the mailbox so we can get another ASAP is great incentive to get Cheese out of the house for four minutes every other day.

So we all win.

Okay, so now for the nitty gritty.

The BAD:

So right before I headed out to go to my 6-month follow-up kidney appointment this morning(which is coming at a good time, as I haven’t been feeling so hot for the last two months, and I'm not preggers but something certainly is taking over my body, it’s a good time to check things out, you know?), I was going through my Facebook pictures and tagging some photos I have had in my photo app.

And you know what I discovered?

My Kidney Brother de-friended me.

Ain’t that some shit?

Lemme tell ya what I think happened.

See, Cheese invited my whole family to the surprise engagement two months ago. Kidney Brother never showed.

He was then invited to the Marathon CarboLoad Dinner/Impromptu Engagement Party the following night. He never showed.

Finally, he was invited to a pizza night when my other brother came to town about a week later.

No show again.

Now, mind you, this is the same brother who, before getting my kidney, had a really sketchy history with my family, was a pretty unhappy, angry, distant and psychologically impaired person. But yet he always talked about wanting to get closer to my family.

So he gets my organ, then doesn’t bother to show up for any family event since.

And he has still never met Cheese, the man I am going to marry.

So after the no-shows in October, I sent him an email and was basically like, “Whatever, I’m pissed.” He sent an email back, blamed my mom for everything – something about missed text messages or voicemail or something – just like he always does.

Everything is always someone else’s fault - the whole world is conspiring against him. What a fucking surprise.

And then at some point, that asshole de-friended me.

Because I called him out on being a meanie.

I don’t know what I ever expected would change, and I am a little pissed at myself that this even bothers me. I mean, I sort of always knew he would put up this “Look at me, I’m a new man with a new perspective” face on for a while, but in the absence of any real therapy or internal self-improvement, of course nothing was going to change in the heart of his personality.

Whatever. Fuck him.


Moving on to The Good:

On the upshot, I found out that I got taken off the waiting list for the Hustle Up the Hancock, and am now going to do the full climb!

That’s 94 floors, bitches!

Oh glorious Hustle!


And Need Some More Good?

Comm recently posted about it being the Chritmas season, and giving more of ourselves. Then I read on Mommymeepa's blog that she is taking it step further and made a list of things she intends to do every day for someone else.

And since I love a good challenge, I am going to challenge myself to do something outside of myelf each day, starting with this month, and then hopefully beyond this month.

'Cause let's be honest, I really can get pretty consumed with my own BS sometimes.

So check out their blogs and see what they are doing.

I'll let you know what I decide for myself.

Reality Check

Biggest Head-In-The-Ass
Is it me, or is Vicky from The Biggest Loser actually The Biggest Bitch?

Let me explain this – IT IS A GAME. You have chosen to go on a program where the goal is to beat your competitors by losing the most weight.

And if you are a threat to the person that stands to win it all, your fat, bitchy, complaining ass (or your husband) will be voted off.

Honestly, there is a ton of money at stake, and The Biggest Loser title, and Vicky thinks that people should still be loyal to their team color?

Give me a big heaping cream-filled fucking break.

And to say that if she gets kicked off, “it’s all Amy’s fault?”

Perhaps she should think about placing blame on herself and the fact that she did not lose more weight.

And my favorite Vicky line of the night:

“If I go home, how much weight do you think I am going to lose? I have two kids and work 60 hours a week!”

Correct me if I wrong, but isn’t this whole thing about lifestyle change?

Did Vicky eat that memo?

I would have sent her ass a-packin' with that statement alone, if for no other reason then to see her recapture her Burger King crown once back to real life.

I mean, I am not trying to be a bitch, but that it the EPITOME of how she got in this situation in the first place. Excuses, excuses, excuses - but no taking of responsibility for her own actions.

Fuck, as I sit here and struggle with my own bad habits, I know how hard it is to correct them, to get back on track, and to take an honest but tough look at what I did to put myself here, now 15 pounds heavier then I was just a few months ago.

No one to blame but myself.

And popcorn.

But I digress.

And what is wrong with Amy?!?!?!?!

Voting Coleen off?!?!

God help her because next week, if she’s below the line, Vicky is going for the choke.

Trust it.


Weave-alicious
In other bat-shit crazy yet-too-good-to-pull-your-eyes-from news, the Real Housewives of Atlanta finale was last night.

And for the most part, those weave-wearing, collagen-lip-plumping, fake-boob-heaving broads didn’t disappoint.

But the real treat will be next week, at the reunion – where I swear NeNe is about to tear the horse mane off of Kim’s evil ass head (spoiler: She tells Kim to keep her legs shut to marry men [Big Poppa is a married man], and calls her a hooker).

Oh, SNAP!

It’s pure reality genius, people.

Or as my sister Devin said, “It’s disgusting, yet something about it makes me feel like a better person.”

X-actly.

Loser

1. Still sick.

Wiping nose on shirt 'cause too achy to get toilet paper from the bathroom.

Moving on.

2. While watching the Biggest Loser and being auditorily assaulted by the nonstop trumpet playing from the apartment across the courtyard (of course, not to be mistaken for the alarm clock that suddenly went off at 10PM the other night and wasn’t slapped off until after midnight – yeah, that was an AWESOME night), I had this thought:

Why do these contestants yell at Jillian and Bob?

I mean, really.

You are in the midst of a once-in-a-lifetime experience to erase years of bad habits, laziness, and inactivity.

You are being given full time access to personal trainers, fitness programs, gyms, chefs, cooking training, eating training – I mean, the list goes on.

So when Jillian tells you to squat your ass until it touches the ground, you best squat your ass until your quads snap right off your body.

How much of a spoiled brat are you that you yell at the people that are trying to improve, if not save in some cases, your life?

I wanted to choke a bitch with a sweat rag.

And the quote of the night goes to LT, who had a less-then-favorable weigh in, and was ultimately eliminated:

“I came to a fat loss show and I gained three pounds! Yeah I’m mad! Wouldn’t you be mad if you went to a make over show and you got uglier?”

Well, LT, when you put it that way….yes, yes I would.

3. If this were the Rebublicans, this shit would headline CNN. At the end of the day, it's probably not a huge story (meaning - it has nothing to do with how this person will fix this nation, just like the whole "how many cars does McCain have" issue but for some reason this is the shit that gets reported - whatever). But if the McCain-Palin ticket was having this problem, you can bet this would broadcasted from the top of the Empire State building.

I mean fuck - Palin farts against the wind and it make headlines. Biden doesn't know basic history, has strep throat from having his foot down there for the last month, and no one says "boo."

Fucking Whoopi Goldberg ask McCain if he is going to turn her into a slave again, and no one says shit.

Not even a blip.

I know I have been beating this bias-media thing like a dead horse, but come on - CNN doesn't even try to hide it at this point. My own local news station doesn't even hide it (of course, Illinois is Obama country, so what a surprise). While reading a recent pro-Obama article (from an actual news source) that a fellow blogger posted, I happened to skim most of the comments (there were like 150, and I finally had to stop after 75). That comment section sounded just like the recess playground in elementary school - it was nothing but horrible name-calling (name-calling! by adults!) and personal insults and attacks against Palin (and McCain, who is obviously associated).

Now, before you jump down my throat, I will also point out that I also read a shit load of conservative articles/blogs. But to be honest, I don't see these types of comments against the Obama camp. Questions/concerns/factual finger pointing? Yes, yes, and yes.

But name calling?

Like children?

Uneducated children?

And I mean that serisouly - like, there were no actual counterpoints, or actual feedback - it was like, "Palin's a bitch." Literally.

And yes, there are certainly exceptions to this rule - there are Democrats who do not do this and there are Rebublicans that do - I am not saying this is exclusive, or that one side is innocent in this.

But why is it that, if you are not voting for Obama or (gasp!) considered conservative, you are the definition of "evil?"

Or, even worse (as I heard today) a racist?

A fucking racist.

I wasn't voting for Hillary either, so does that make me a lady-hater?

Why can't it just be as simple as, "I don't agree with his politics?"

And if it were McCain spouting Obama's politics, I wouldn't vote for his ass either.

Why can't it just be as simple as a disagreement of politics? Why can't we agree to disagree, instead of Democrats launching insults of being "Bush" lovers (p.s. I am not - I never voted for the guy)? Why does it have to get ugly to point of insulting?

I used to say that I can't wait for this election to be over, but the truth is that, even after the votes are cast, this election has revealed far uglier and deeper problems with us as a people and nation. Politics aside - it literally brings me to tears when I think about the direction the US is headed - the economy, the media, the anger, the divide - just how people treat each other, how intolerate people are showing themselves to be.

I am just so horribly sick of it all.